Moving is hard. Maybe it’s the uncertainty of what your new home will look like or how you’ll fill so many hours in the day with activities that aren’t your career anymore. Maybe you are just afraid. Whatever it may be for you, moving into an assisted living facility can seem like a daunting and overwhelming task. As a matter of fact, even many seniors want to avoid this situation.
Since you’re reading this article then, you already know that you want to help your aging parent or grandparent find and move into an assisted living facility, and we fully support that decision. Many seniors are confused and afraid about how their independence can be lost because of their inability to take care of themselves and how they will be looked after.
Downsizing tips for family caregivers
Fortunately, there are many things you can do to make the transition more comfortable for your parent or grandparent. When they still live at home, you can start preparing them for their move. Acknowledge their fears and believe that they don’t want to lose what makes them happy.
Finding a suitable facility
This can be as easy as searching for your town and the service you require. For example, if you live in St Louis, try an internet search for St Louis senior centers. This will bring up a list of local centers that you can assess. Once the decision on location has been made you will need to support your relative with the move.
The following tips can help you respectfully move things along:
1. Think before you speak and highlight the positives
Be careful how you approach conversations about what to keep. Avoid questions that may sound judgmental like: “Why have you held onto this?”
Moving is a stressful time for anyone. This is particularly true when moving into assisted living facilities. When the stress takes over, take time to review the positives of the move.
2. Plan for their new home (and don’t force keep/toss decisions)
Knowing the layout of the new property including dimensions will help inform decisions on what to keep. There are a lot of memories tied up in our belongings. The need to make so many decisions can be threatening to a senior. You should allow them to put off some decisions to a later date. For example, have separate piles for keep, throw and decide later belongings.
3. Appeal to your relative’s charitable nature (and avoid getting sentimental)
Have your parent or grandparent donate items to a local charity shop; knowing that their sacrifice is going to help someone else can make giving up cherished belongings a little easier.
It is probable that when you are going through your parent’s home you will find items that have a sentimental value to you. Don’t make it harder for your parents to downsize by becoming sentimental. Either take the items yourself (with your parent’s permission) or get rid of them.
There is no way to make this transition easy for your parent or grandparent. However, you can help them by being there to support them through the process. The upside of the situation is that many seniors find an unexpected boost in their quality of life by moving from a large home and yard to an assisted living community. The change allows them to live a much simpler, healthier lifestyle and opens up time that they would have spent doing chores around the house and yard.
Very good tips. My parents found their own assisted living place which made it much easier.