The Secret to Healthy Relationships: 8 Ways to Help Your Spouse be More Communicative

There’s no denying that the key to a healthy relationship is communication. Whether you’re talking and getting to know each other, expressing your needs, setting boundaries, becoming comfortable with sex, or planning your future, good communication is the key to getting it all right. But, even if you’re talkative and ready to communicate openly, what if your partner isn’t?

While they may understand that communication is important, they might not be quite there yet, so you’ll need to proactive in opening them up and helping them communicate with you. Today, we’re going to focus on eight ways you can do just that.

1. Start Off Comfortably

Getting to someone to feel comfortable enough to talk to you is all about approaching any given conversation in the right way. This means starting the conversation right, and not saying something like ‘we need to talk.’ This immediately sets the tone for a negative conversation, and the non-talkative partner will shut off and close down. Just approach it in a friendly and light-hearted manner.

2. Explain Your Importance

Sometimes, sensitive subjects can be hard for people to talk about for all kinds of reasons, but if the conversation topic is important to you, then let this be known to your partner. If they understand that the conversation means a lot to you, then they should be much more willing to talk about it. For example, if you’re looking for a divorce, you need to emphasize that this is something that really matters to you. You can always check out the Divorce UK guide for more information on this.

3. Don’t Be Tired

If you’re tired when you start a conversation, it’s automatically going to go badly when you can’t think straight, and everything gets confusing. Be awake and present in the conversation, and the topics will flow much more easily.

4. Listen, Listen, Listen

Conversations work both ways, which is why it’s so important to ensure that when your partner is talking, you are listening and not just holding on and waiting until you next get a chance to speak. Listen to your partner’s words and be compassionate about how they may be feeling. The more you listen, the more they’ll open up.

5. Approach the Conversation Calmly

While you might be talking about something that’s upset you or even make you angry, if you pounce on your partner, or jump onto the conversation at 100%, this is going to shut your partner down, and they won’t want to talk. Be cool, calm, and collected for the conversation to run smoothly.

6. Be Direct, But Not Forceful

It’s important to check in with your partner to see how they are and whether there’s anything that needs to be talked about, but you can’t do this in a way that’s forceful or pressuring. You need to subtly ask if everything’s okay and if there’s an uncomfortable situation to talk about, be gentle when approaching it.

7. Be Vulnerable

Being vulnerable is so important when it comes to conversations with your partner, and should be one of the key aspects of conversation you need to be working on. Be open and honest with your partner, and they’ll have far more respect and will be much more willing to open up and be vulnerable with you.

8. Ask the Right Questions

Your partner may be closed off and untalkative for a number of reasons; whether that’s just how they are, or they’ve had a bad day and have a lot on their mind. To get to the answers and to help breed the conversation, ask open-ended questions, like ‘what’s going on with you right now?’ and ‘is there anything I can do for you?’.

Summary

As you can see, there’s a lot to think about when it comes to getting your partner to open up, regardless of why they’re closed off in the first place. Be calm, reassuring, and gentle, and the whole opening up experience can be a fantastic opportunity for positive growth.