Tips for Setting Up Playdates with Disabled Children

Let’s face it, all children whether they have disabilities or not…want to have friends and play dates with other children. As parents and grandparents, it’s our job to encourage our kids to accept one another and to include others in their social circles and on playdates.

There is a little girl who’s 9 year’s old who lives right down our street . She suffers from two different disabilities and her mother was telling me how she long’s for playtime and friendship with other little girls her same age. After getting to know her mother, we decided to set up some playdates for her and my granddaughter to get together and have some fun.

Here are a few tips for setting up playdates with disabled children.

1. Talk to the parents and/or caregivers to find out if they are receptive to you setting up a playdate with your child. Get to know them and learn about the disability that the child suffers from, including any limitations that they may have.

2. Sit down and talk with your child(ren) about other children who have disabilities. Explain to them that they must be respectful to them at all times. Let them know that there is nothing wrong with being different or having limitations. When it comes to kids…more often than not, they have a lot of the same interests and things in common.

Examples: Music, Television Shows, Reading Books, Sports/Athletics (favorite teams), Hobbies, Favorite Play Toys, Food, etc.

After you feel that your child understands how to treat a disabled child with respect and understanding, move on to step three.

3. Find a safe place to hold the playdate. This may be at their home, your home or a neutral location. Please keep in mind any “special” limitations or fears that the child may have. It’s important to come up with an appropriate location that you and the other parent agree upon first.

For instance, if your child receives in-home care, a playdate at home might be better suited to their needs. Nowadays there are lots of care providers out there that develop in-home care services for disabled children and therefore a playdate at home could be a real confidence booster for a child who feels uncertain about leaving home to meet friends.

4. Pick the perfect day and time to hold it! Some kids do better with one another during the late morning or late afternoon hours. Some kids are cranky during certain times of the day. I feel that it’s important to pick a day and time that works for both children involved.

5. Plan out an activity that both children can participate in and enjoy.

6. When it comes to introductions, introduce them and guide them through those initial first minutes. After a few minutes children usually feel comfortable enough to carry on any conversations on their own. Let the children interact freely with one another without you hovering over them. They want to feel just like any kid…having a relationship with a friend!

7. If things go well, set up additional meetings.

As I previously stated, I’ve been working with another parent who lives in our neighborhood with hosting playdates with my granddaughter and her daughter. We’ve gotten the girls together four times during the past 9 weeks and they’ve quickly become great friends. We rotate the activities for the girls and we make sure that it’s an activity that both of them can equally participate in. This has been a wonderful experience for everyone involved.

There is a great article online called “Teaching Your Child About Disabilities” where you can find helpful information and get more tips on how to help your child to accept, respect and get involved with other children who have disabilities. I’ve learned a lot by reading it and I think you’ll learn a lot too!

Do you host playdates for your child? Do you include children who have disabilities? Do you have any tips to share with me and my readers? If so, please leave them in my blog’s comment form below.